Friday, August 13, 2010
I can't bring myself to schedule Joshua's next surgery. I need some strength and wisdom on this one. It was supposed to be done about a year ago, but his Infectious Disease specialist (who follows his lymph nodes to rule out cancer suspicions) suggested holding off on surgeries until he was cleared through Cardiology and Pulmonology first. This was because his lips and entire mouth area kept turning blue when he cried. She caught a glimpse of it during one of his appointments and it was alarming enough for her to send us for clearance. Hence his recent heart contrast study. Anyway, he has been cleared and went through with his ENT/Cardio procedures. Now we have another urology surgery. This one can be mighty grueling. I am definitely not looking forward to the recovery. I can't even bring myself to call the office to set it up. I HATE SURGERY! Maybe that's why, lol. Whatever it is, I can't hold off much longer. I just hate to put him under again so soon. They are magnificent, but surgeons often treat these procedures/surgeries as if changing their underwear... so casual, so routine and so normal. But to me, a mother trying to keep her piece of glass from shattering, it isn't all that easy.